I knew I knew not
And I didn’t know I knew
Now my face implodes
***
What’s this trigger do?
Ouch, my right foot really hurts
Let’s try the left one
***
As I tell my tales
Watch me blink out in Morse Code:
“I’m a lying [bleep]”
***
I am not lying
Except for what I just said
And what I’ll say next
***
I’ve been a liar
A lot longer than Barack
But without his gift
***
My nose doesn’t grow
(Way too much rhinoplasty)
But my stitches twitch
***
Lefty blogs confused
They’ll opine on me, after
Rahm’s conference call
***
Who’s nervous? Not me
I’ve looked like this ever since
They cut up my face
***
I own some vineyards
Which will give me a good place
To store my sour grapes
***
Waterboarding stinks
I thought it would moisturize
But my face pruned up


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